Tag Archives: New years Resolutions

To Be Loved

TO BE LOVED

“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.”
William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night’s Dream

#To be loved is the stuff of the ages, the poets of old and the stories they told.

#To be loved

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To be loved by a puppy is cute, then they grow into those mischievous brutes

#To be loved

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To be loved by a child is a joy to cherish, til they hit teens and then they vanish

#To be loved

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To be loved by an audience is great for the ego, but they go home at the end of the show

#To be loved

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To be loved by a nation, as president or dictator, an election or uprising and it’s “see you later!”

#To be loved

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To be loved by a fiancée is sweet and delicious, to make it to the altar is so very precious

#To be loved

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To be loved by your spouse years down the track, is a feeling to cherish to eternity and back

 

#To be loved

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I am so blessed.  I have known most of these – although I’m not aiming for president, but I can now honestly say that I am blessed to know that the lady I fell in love with and am now even more in love with, is still greatly enamoured with me.  She has known me for some years now, knows my considerable flaws, knows that at times I drive her nuts, I forget things, I probably keep her awake at night with my snoring, if not because of the worrying she does over the strife I get into, and yet, she loves me.

“You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.”
Jodi Picoult, My Sister’s Keeper

How powerful and motivating is it to be loved?

The search for love through the ages has inspired acts ranging from incredible heroism to just as incredible acts of stupidity.  However, the desire to be loved the way I am loved is inspirational, motivational and incredibly empowering.  It is the true magic of the universe – of all the billions of people on this planet, I found the one with whom together forever is our reality.

There are many ways people can desire to be loved.  The flirtatious and frivolous one night stands or casual flings.  Sure, they may be fun for a time, but it’s like eating a packet of potato crisps – almost straight away, you feel hungry for something else.  Compared to a proper meal, there is no satisfaction, no comparison – it’s just an appetizer.

Another way to be loved is to have control over another, to demand their love and affection.  But demanding or commanding a person to love you denies them the opportunity to choose to love you and to express and to give love from the depths of their heart.  How could you know if this was what they felt, or only what you demanded?  It’s an ego trip by a heart very lacking in confidence and self-esteem, scared to take a chance on love when it is easier and safer to extort it.

A very popular way to be loved is to allow yourself to be a toy for others, to be subservient to their wishes.  But how would you know if they loved you, or were merely using you as a convenience?  Where is your security?  When they finish with you, what then?

To be loved by someone needy is scary.  Once their needs are fulfilled, what then?  Or will they ever be fulfilled?  And is it love for you, or fear from them that keeps them close?  There is no long-term tenure or happiness there either!

To be loved by someone freely, someone who knows all about you and still chooses to love you, chooses to be with you and commit to you totally, regardless of the consequences, trusting that as a team you can face the future together, that is the love to desire, when you desire to be loved.  This is the stuff of ages, known by the poets of old through the stories they told.

If this is not what you have in your life, sure, learn the tricks, learn what to say, read the books, get a puppy, but above all, become worthy of the love of the person you would desire to be loved by.  Do your bit.  Look in the mirror at your heart and soul.  Is what you see what you would expect the love of your life to become excited over?  Are you excited about you?

The first step is to fall in love with yourself – like who you are and be proud of what you have to offer.  Become attractive on the inside and let it overflow to the world around you.  People notice.  People will want to be near you, not necessarily to fall in love with you, but because it’s a great feeling for them, like a warm fire on a cold evening.  And somewhere amongst those people you may find the connection to the one you desire to be loved by.

When they arrive – be worthy of them.  Prepare for them.  Make it worth their journey, the journey they took, to be loved by the person they seek too.

Remember, they are just like you, another person, feeling alone, seeking to be loved by someone to love them down through the ages too.  Treat them as you wish to be loved.

My wish for you is to feel the blessing that I feel each morning as I wake to greet my day, my life and my wife, and again each evening as I give thanks for the day I have had, and say “Goodnight” to the one I so love to wake up with each morning!

If you feel this has been valuable to you, please share or reblog it for others to enjoy and gain from also.  Everyone deserves to be loved!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”
Marilyn Monroe

 

Merry Christmas Wishes

Merry Christmas Wishes

#Merry Christmas Wishes

Merry Christmas Wishes to all!
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“Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before! What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas…perhaps…means a little bit more!”
Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

Who will you send Merry Christmas Wishes to this year?

Christmas has changed.  Looking around the world, and down through the ages where the legends of Saint Nicholas and the various other Christmas figures began, we grew up with a romanticized view of Christmas.  For some people, Christmas meant snow.  In Australia, New Zealand and South Africa, it was intense heat.  But always, the #Merry Christmas Wishes went out to people everywhere, mostly with a picture of a guy in a Santa Suit, en route from the North Pole with Reindeer pulling a sleigh of gifts for children all over the world.

Collecting the mail at Christmas time was exciting.  Checking the mailbox to see who had sent Merry Christmas Wishes to you, seeing who had replied to your Merry Christmas Wishes to them, and perhaps a parcel arriving, wrapped with string and a little bow….  That one HAD to go under the tree, until Christmas morning…

Some homes and probably most, had Christmas Trees, the lucky ones had real trees, some had pine tree branches, others had store-bought trees, and all were decorated for the occasion.

So what happened to our Merry Christmas Wishes?

#Merry Christmas Wishes

All the Christmas Cards
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It seems that from when life sped up, computers made sending E-Cards easier and cheaper than the escalating cost of posting Christmas Cards, and the nuclear family scattered to all corners of the globe, that somewhere along the way, Merry Christmas Wishes lost their power and attraction.

Almost.  Those who have not lost themselves in the commercialism of Christmas and who have a family to share the occasion with may still have it.  However, a new type of Christmas Celebration has evolved; that of the Christmas Orphans.  Here, you are a person or perhaps a couple alone for this wondrous day of the year, perhaps working or living away in a city remote from family, or you no longer have family.  Your personal circumstances may not allow you to share Christmas Day with your birth family, for a variety of reasons, and your Merry Christmas Wishes have nowhere to go.

Then along came the Christmas Orphans parties.  Here, people in these situations arrange their own parties, often strangers until the day, but quite often, friends afterwards.  The parties are advertised either by venues, organisations, churches or individuals who want to host the party.  Most people bring something to contribute, and it’s a great day.  For some people, literally a life saver!  Christmas alone can be a challenge for some.

But for those for whom this is Christmas and no matter how much they enjoy the Christmas Orphans parties, there is often regret, even some remorse, for the situations in their lives that has brought them to this moment, when they have no family nearby to share their Merry Christmas Wishes with.

#Merry Christmas Wishes

The First Noel?

I regret the passing of Christmas and the commercialism it has now become.  Retail stores bank on the billions of dollars spent at Christmas time to shore up their balance sheets and make their profit and loss sheets acceptable, because consumer confidence around the world in recent years has been at an all-time low.  The televisions blast their “spend big at Christmas Time” message at ever decreasing intervals during the rubbish programs broadcast by the TV stations, because this is not a TV Ratings period and they can get away with broadcasting the same “Christmas Specials” they have used for the last decade.  I don’t know how many more times I can watch “The Griswalds”, “Polar Express”, “Uncle Buck” and the obligatory “Christmas Carols in the Park” broadcasts!  Fireworks displays are in every town and village centre, sometimes in many places throughout cities and towns; the signage is out but the spirit feels low.

Yes, I regret not having the family experiences we had as children for our Christmas each year.  We all have to grow up and create our own lives, I understand that.  But I miss the old spirit of Merry Christmas Wishes I grew up with.

Christmas for me was always about sharing with my loved ones, not trying to buy their loyalty or affection.  The Christmas Spirit, if it only comes out once a year, is a lie.  If it takes an event of this magnitude for anyone to say to another “I Love You”, then they are lying too.

Is there anything about the spirit of Christmas that should NOT apply EVERY day of the year?

#Merry Christmas Wishes

Family gathering at Christmas
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Yes, perhaps one thing and it is purely logistical.  Christmas is a time of everyone gathering around to celebrate, but because we all have our own lives and homes, often separated from each other and from close family, we can’t see each other every day of the year.  However, if the gift giving and all those feel-good feelings towards one another are reserved for just that one day, then perhaps the spirit of commercialisation of Christmas has won, and the Old Christmas Spirit has gone forever.

During your Christmas celebrations this year, take a step back and observe yourself.  Are you expressing things to people that you would not share with them throughout the year?  Why is that?  Why can we not share these Merry Christmas Wishes type feelings every day of the year?

Will next year be different?

#Merry Christmas Wishes

Next Year?
fun-n-first.blogspot.com

What will make 2014 a better year than 2013 was?  What have you planned that will make the difference?  Nothing yet?  It’s getting late and certainly time to think about your New Years Resolutions, including something about the true Merry Christmas Wishes, and the spirit of Christmas of old, all year through!

I wish for you that the value of your presence to those you love is much greater than the value of your presents for them, and that the greatest gifts you share are those you have shared all year!  I send you my Merry Christmas Wishes too!

If you have found value in this post, please share or reblog it to your friends too.  Everyone deserves some true Christmas Spirit at least once a year!  Click here to get yours NOW!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails, and Merry Christmas Wishes!

Ray Jamieson

“My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?”
Bob Hope

“Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind. ”
Mary Ellen Chase

New Years Resolutions

New Years Resolutions

#New Years Resolutions

What are you planning for your New years Resolutions?
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“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” Bill Vaughan

You might think it’s strange to be writing about New Years Resolutions a month before Christmas.  However, on December 31st, at 11.59 pm, when your New Years Resolutions are about to take effect, it’s likely your mind will be on Auld Lang Syne, champagne, a clock counting backwards or looking for someone to kiss and say “Happy New Year” to!

Where it will NOT be, is on your New Years Resolutions!

There will be some folks who ask you, in the wee small hours after the stroke of midnight “Whatcha gunna do fer yer Noo Years Reso (Hiccup) lootions?” and even if you answered, they aren’t going to remember.  No, that’s no time to be talking about New Years Resolutions.

#New Years Resolutions

Darn it!
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Now is the time.  Now is when you can start to look back at the year just gone and decide whether or not you are happy with it.  If not, can you make it so you will be happy with it by the end of the year?  And if you can’t make it right by the deadline, now is the time to start planning to do it better next year.  But not just planning to do it better – the road to hell is paved with good intentions, putting a program in place that ensures it will be better!

What are New Years Resolutions?

They are goals.  Anyone who says they have never set a goal, but who has made New Years Resolutions has set goals.  They may not have achieved them, but they have set them.

There is a formula for success with goals, and it’s not a hard one to adopt.  However, the challenge is maintaining your efforts towards achieving the goal, and that’s where a bit of structure comes in handy.  There’s a blog about it HERE. The old “SMART” mnemonic is still valid when deciding on the New Years Resolutions.

S = Specific.  Exactly the condition and result you expect.

M = Measurable. You need to be able to evaluate your progress and have the progress under your control.

A = Attainable/realistic.  A stretch for you maybe, but certainly possible to achieve.

R = Relevant.  It has to be something that fits in with your life, direction, desires and makes sense in your world.

T = Timely – within a set time frame.  It has a deadline, so you cannot procrastinate with it.

This is the WHAT of New Years Resolutions; deciding what will make your new year better than the last, but HOW you achieve it is a little different and the most challenging part.  That’s where you need a program that will keep you on track. That may or may not involve other people, but it almost always involves a little self-discipline and a routine of success habits that you plug into to make sure your goals achieve the priority in your life they deserve, whilst giving you the freedom to live that only a life with a “Plan B” in place can feel like!

What has prevented you achieving your earlier New Years Resolutions?

Statistics show that only 8% of people are successful at achieving their New Years Resolutions.  49% sometimes succeed, and 24% NEVER succeed!  Why is this?  Why do so many fail?

#New Years Resolutions

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Sometimes, they were the wrong ones to begin with, set in haste over a celebratory or reflective drink, trying to fix things that were never going to work.  However, even with the right goals and New Years Resolutions, obstacles still crop up.  Financial troubles, people letting you down, availability of necessary items, resources and even time.

This all requires planning because the one thing we all know is that when you plan something, you need to plan also for it going over budget and over time – it’s called contingency planning!  You need a “Plan B” built into your program!

Things do happen to upset plans.  It can be from your own cause – such as forgetting a previous commitment, ill health, family commitments clashing and lots more.  It can be from external causes, such as the weather, your employer making an unexpected demand on your time, a promotion or other change, losing your job, a car breakdown or a disaster from someone else that drags you in, and so on.

Contingency plans are made to handle such situations.  Put simply, you need to allow for extra resources in all areas, including time, manpower, money and whatever else is specifically relevant to your New Years Resolutions.

Why do 8% of people succeed with New Years Resolutions?

People who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t explicitly make resolutions.  In other words, people with a plan!  These successful people think about them in advance, write them out and set them as a goal.

Incidentally, this is about the same success rate as regular goalsetting!

Why bother with New Years Resolutions?

Because the New Year is a time of change!  A time of renewal.  A time to review and correct what hasn’t worked for you, and to take time to plan ahead and get it right!  The human evolutionary drive (Entrepreneurs Credo) is such that we are programmed to strive for better – we cannot escape it.

However, throughout the year, we are all full on busy with work and life commitments.  The end of the old year/start of the New Year is the one time of year generally when people can take a little time off to celebrate with family and friends, reflect, review their progress and restart the New Year with renewed vigour, enthusiasm and New Years Resolutions that may make the coming year better than the previous one.

#New Years Resolutions

Sydney Harbour on New Years Eve
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How do you make sure you can put your New Years Resolutions out there, and make them turn into your New Years reality?

Plug them into a program, a system that will ensure they work.  A program that provides that supportive environment around you that encourages you to focus on what is important, and protects you from distractions that would take you away from the important challenges, of being the best you that you can be, and that you and your family deserves.

Check out this blog on why you should systemize personal development if you are wondering why you need a system to plug into.

If you enjoyed this blog and value the message, please share it and reblog it.  Who knows what a difference it could make in someone else’s life! When you wish to start your New Year’s Program, start HERE!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray

#New Years Resolutions

Celebrate every success!
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© Life Change 90 2013

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